How to Deal With Break Up: How to Get Over Being Dumped
Posted: Wednesday, January 28, 2009
by Brett Maynard
The initial shock of break up can be quick and devastating. Knowing how to deal with break up is very important because doing the wrong things can make an already uncomfortable situation a lot worse. The least thing you want to do when wondering how to get over being dumped, is making any moves that will further your ex away from you.
Luckily, there are things you can do to that is very beneficial to not only help your relationship with your ex, but also help you cope with how to get over being dumped. There are three pieces of solid advice on this subject, but first, lets talk about a step you should do before this. This will help put you on better terms with your ex.
After you have spent some personal time alone reflecting on yourself, the situation, and what it really means to you, you should write down a list of the pros and cons about the relationship and your ex. You should think about why you really got dumped and then, if you are ready, move on to the last - but most important step.
What you want to do now, ( if you feel that you are absolutely ready to contact the person ) is write them a handwritten letter of sincere honest apology. This should be in either mail or email form but absolutely no texts, instant messaging, or calling them! It is very important to sound like your doing well and put together.
Don't sound negative in any way - just wholly positive. You should say in the letter that you agree that the break up was the best course of action for both of you and that it has helped you see things in a new light. Tell them that you need personal time to grow and reflect about things and about life in general - and then wish them the best.
Now, after you write the letter there are a couple of simple and effective ways on how to deal with break up that you want to be thinking about at this time.
1. Start things off very slowly - almost unnoticed. If you happen to run into your ex in any way, you need to have a casual, relaxed, and positive demeanor. A simple 'Hello, how are you doing' will suffice. However, you shouldn't spend more than a minute or two in casual conversation. Nothing serious or deep. Avoid revealing to much personal information as you can. This will add a sense of mystery and wonderment. For example, if you are at a social event, tell them that you need to get back with whoever you came with. Additionally, its very important to maintain a good, strong posture and maintain excellent eye contact.
2. Work on yourself. Think of the things that are your best attributes and focus to work on them. Imagine that the next time you see your ex, or anyone that you know - that might not hold you in the best light, that you are truly changing for the good and evolving into something much better. This works on the span of all relationships, because personal evolutional progression is one of the most important attributes of attraction.
It is also very important to work on your appearance. Make sure that you are kept presentable and attractive. What your wanting is that " You're really looking good comment." You attract what you think about most of the time, and if you don't like what your attracting, think about what you want - not what you don't want.
Now, keep in mind that when you are thinking and working on ways to improve yourself, that they are purely personal. You must not do this for anything other than your sacred reasons for self improvement that are only exclusive to just you.
3. Act like your single - Because you are! Remember that you are free from the restrictions and responsibilities that come with a relationship. You will have the freedom to hang out with your friends more, go on dates, and set your schedule and activities how a single person has the freedom to do.
You will find that by implementing the first set of steps and then by working on yourself, that you will start feeling better in all aspects. You will feel that you deserve good things, and in turn, will start looking for and attracting good things in your life. Remember, you are the captain of your own ship and where you go is determined by you.
Brett has many interests ranging in the social and emotional fields of study on human behavior. If you would like to learn more on how to improve a situation go to www.squidoo.com/MagicOfMaking-Up to see more information and free explanatory videos on how to deal with break up, as well as testimonials from people who have survived break ups.
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